The eight-step framework runs separate intake, joint ground rules, uninterrupted statements, common ground, options, evaluation, a documented agreement and a follow-up check. Move between steps on signals, not on a clock: a person can restate the other’s point, the issues are listed, or an option has been accepted, and stop or split into private sessions when rules are broken repeatedly, someone is not taking part in good faith, or there is a serious imbalance of power.
The mediator’s decision points across the eight-step framework, as distinct from the procedure itself, which is set out in the governance articles.
This Article Adds Judgement, Not a Second Procedure
The mechanics of a mediation, with opening, storytelling, interest exploration, options and agreement, are already written in Mediation, Mediation Process and Conflict Mediation Process. This article assumes you have read them and covers the decisions inside the eight-step version in the parent article. For the same material in the community-justice setting see Structured Mediation Steps.
Where the Eight Steps Differ From the Other Versions
- Intake comes first and is separate. The governance material also has private preparation meetings.
- Common ground is its own step. The governance process folds it into interests.
- Follow-up is at one week. Governance mediation suggests a month for a complex agreement, sooner for simple ones, and the conflict-resolution article gives one week, one month and three months. See Follow-Up & Accountability.
The versions do not compete: choose the one you were trained in and be consistent.
Decision Points
| Step | Mediator’s job | Move on when | Stop or split when |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1. Intake (separate) | Hear each person, explain the process, judge suitability | Both are willing and the case is suitable | Criminal conduct, serious power imbalance, or one will not take part |
| 2. Ground rules | Agree rules, get each person’s consent | Both say yes aloud | Either refuses the rules |
| 3. Statements | Enforce no interruption; summarise each | Each says “yes, that’s it” to your summary | Rules broken repeatedly |
| 4. Common ground | List agreements | A short list both accept | None found; go back to step 3 |
| 5. Options | Collect without judging | Ideas dry up | Parties start evaluating early; hold the line |
| 6. Evaluate | Test each option against both needs | One option both can live with | Deadlock; try a private session |
| 7. Document | Write specific terms | Both confirm the wording | Disagreement about wording means no agreement yet |
| 8. Follow-up | Check in | Agreement holding | Agreement failing; reconvene |
Judgement Calls
Intake is for being heard and for preparation. The parent article says separate intake prevents a shouting match “because each person has already vented.” The better reason is that each person has been listened to, has had the process explained and has been screened for suitability. Venting as a way to discharge anger is not supported; see The Pause Technique.
Private sessions (caucus). Use them when a joint session stalls or a person cannot say something in front of the other. Say before you begin what you will and will not repeat to the other side.
Summaries. Replace “always” and “never” with events, and replace insults with the underlying complaint. Check that each person agrees with the summary before you continue.
Unsuitable cases. Mediation lists cases that are not suitable: a serious power imbalance, criminal conduct and bad faith. Note the tension with the community-justice article, which lists mediation as part of the response to assault; use mediation there only alongside the accountability process, not as a replacement for it. See Proportional Consequences.
Common Mistakes
- Running to a clock — rushing step 4 produces fake common ground.
- Letting step 5 become step 6 — criticising ideas as they appear kills them.
- Mediating your own friend — you are not neutral; see Selecting Mediators.
- Declaring victory at the handshake — the agreement is tested later.
Do not mediate under threat
If either party has threatened the other or you cannot keep them from touching each other, stop the session and separate them. Mediation does not work under threat, and a mediator is not a guard.
What’s Next
- Learn next: Finding Common Ground — step 4 in detail
- Combine with: When Mediation Fails — what to do when a step cannot be passed